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It's Time to Find a Marriage-Minded Man You Can Trust

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He Sent Me a Text to Say He is Serious with Someone Else

Hi Shana,
I dated a guy for three months last year. During the three months that we dated, I began to develop a strong connection with him. At the three-month mark, he sent me a text message informing he that he can no longer see me because he has been talking to someone else for the past month and that it is "serious."

This completely threw me off guard as I thought he and I were progressing towards becoming exclusive. I asked him to meet me in person for a better explanation of what happened, but I never got the answers I was looking for even though he did meet with me.

Fast forward about 7 months later, I receive a text message from him saying "Hi, I'm not sure if you remember me but I wanted to reach out and see how you are doing." I hesitated, but I did respond. A part of me is curious why he texted me so many months later. A part of me never stopped having feelings for him. Another part of me feels that he is being selfish and seeking a friendship and/or is lonely...
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How Do I Know If I Am Ready for Marriage?


Hey, Shana.


I would like to marry someday, but I am honestly afraid to commit. I have quite a complicated history due some dysfunction in my family and I am fearful that I won't be prepared to marry. How do I know I am ready for marriage?





Hi, Sophia.


I understand that getting married can be scary. I get it. I've been there. I understand that you want to be prepared because you want to make sure you have a successful relationship. 


Kudos to you for being aware that there could be some things in your history that could cause challenges in marriage. Many people choose to overlook their past or forge ahead without taking it into consideration. Good for you for being aware. 


If you haven't already, I encourage you to get professional guidance and help to understand your upbringing and family dynamics. While I don't understand specifically what you are referring to when you say that there was some "dysfunction"...

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"I'm just not attracted."


This week I've been thinking about my single journey and about some of the decisions I made along the way--and one of those decisions went something like this:  

Imagine there was a gathering at a church for singles. I'd walk in, look around and think, “Well, there's no one here that I'm attracted to.” And I would leave after the night was over and never go back.

Or, maybe a friend would invite me to her house for a get together. I’d walk in, look around and think, “Well, there's no one here that I'm attracted to” and I'd leave without really having any conversations or trying to get to know anyone.

I'm not saying there doesn't have to be some physical attraction, but attraction isn’t just physical. It happens on many levels. It's physical, emotional, spiritual, and intellectual.

But when we immediately only look at the physical and rule someone out based solely on looks or “chemistry” whether it’s in a...

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